Posted by
SmartFella? on Sunday, August 02, 2009 8:22:15 AM
Have you noticed that there are several instances in the news lately of various government agencies around the Fruited Plain demanding their “fair” share of Stimulus Money?
A recent example of the current Governmental Give-Me-Mine Phenomena was the money given out for more police to fight crime. The arguments went something like this…
Ø We used to have a lot of crime.
Ø We did an excellent job of fighting crime before The Stimulus started Stimulating.
Ø Now our crime rate is markedly reduced.
Ø We are very proud of what we have accomplished.
Ø Now Big Government is distributing money to hire police to fight Big Crime where there is Big Crime.
Ø They are giving Stimulus Money to places where crime is now rampant but we are not rampant any longer.
Ø If we still had a lot of crime we would have a lot of crime and we would have been given Stimulus Money to fight the crime that we no longer have.
Ø This is not fair!
We in this Stimulus Era (Renaissance Period, Industrial Revolution, Stone Age, Age of Enlightenment and now Stimulus Era) are all demanding our fair share, whether we need a fair share or not. It is sortalike (here comes the Foolishness)…
Ø Big Government decrees that all persons residing in the Good Ole USofA are to be given a $1,000 Bill.
Ø The $1,000 Bills are duly stuffed one night into individual envelopes by Jimmy Carter in his basement.
Ø Barack Obama himself distributes the envelopes at 52,712 gigantic Distribution Parties simultaneously held throughout the country.
Ø Within minutes of the envelopes being opened we hear the following chorus of unhappiness and consternation rising from assembled used-to-be-excited and very happy multitude…
o How come my bill is not new and crisp like his bill is?
o Why was my bill not facing forward in my envelope like his was?
o Why does my bill have a corner bent down?
It's gonna be an awful sight to behold.
Would I kid u?